I had a pretty terrible sleep and didn’t really want to participate in Sunday. I wasn’t going to let my friend down again though, so I logged in WoW for a morning of mythical goodness. Luckily we didn’t do anything too hard so I got to feel pretty chill. Wifey even joined us for some dungeons which was great. She was amazing, as usual. I wish she would do that with me more often.
I have been feeling a bit flat for the last few days. I want to say that I don’t know why because that’s easier to deal with than knowing why. For the longest time I’ve really only had a couple of people in my life. I haven’t had many ‘friends’. I’m really missing having friends.
A lot of you out there would be feeling what that feels like because of the Covid-19 lockdown. That’s been my every day life for years. The problem with that is I don’t really know how to make friends while still stuck in my little agoraphobia bubble. I find it hard to talk about myself and small talk kind of makes me feel awkward so I don’t know where to start.
Day 383 – 20 April 2020
I had a horrible nights sleep again. I kept having dreams about someone I’m missing which only makes me miss them more. Then Homer decided to wake me at 7 am, 8.30 am and 10 am. Homer really wanted me to be awake today. At 10 am I gave up on trying to sleep grabbed a shower and then got into colouring a Puddles.
In today’s Adventures of Arthur Puddles we find him stocking up on fresh produce for the lockdown. Instead of heading to the local supermarket he went down to a local farm to support them on National Ag Day.
It’s the second week of the ‘It Made Me Smile’ project and I have learned something; I don’t smile every day or at the very least, I’m not aware of all the times I smile. I need to be much more mindful of recording when I do have something that makes me smile. I did manage to get a list together though.
20 April 2020: When hubby and I purposely shouted wrong answers at the TV while watching ‘The Chase – UK’, trying to come up with the funniest answers we could. It was even better when there was a question about musicals and we both shouted ‘Cats’. That was not the right answer.
19 April 2020: When wifey did some mythic dungeons with us AND when hubby got the kitchen almost completely clean.
18 April 2020: When hubby cooked steak for dinner. It was perfect. He’s the best at cooking steak.
17 April 2020: When I spent some time with my friend ‘The Pally’. I don’t know how he can make me laugh even when I don’t feel like it but that is most definitely his superhero power.
16 April 2020: When I got to spend some time with wifey.
15 April 2020: When I watched Fish Mascot Eats Worker. I can’t explain it, you just have to see it. Thanks Youtube for this recommendation.
14 April 2020: When I wrote my latest catch up post. I talked about things I’d learned, Youtube Channels I enjoy and because I hadn’t thought I was going to do it, I felt proud that I got it done (even though I didn’t get it posted.)
Oh, before I got out of bed this morning I watched a handful of Youtube videos. One of them was from Struthless. He made a video called ‘How to Get Motivated During a Crisis’. He gave some really great ideas about getting to things, if that’s what you want to do during this time. He also pointed out that if you don’t want to be productive, that’s cool too. Definitely worth a watch if you need some inspiration.
I will watch it a couple more times this week I’m sure. I need a gentle nudge (forceful shove) to get back into the swing of things. One thing I have done is created an easier ‘Happy List’ to try and get me back on track and keep my overactive imagination focused on more positive things.
Do more than 7 Puddles this week
Start knitting a beanie
Finish knitting one of hubbys gloves
Nap/rest at least 2 hours every day
Workout 2 times
Meditate 3 times
Find some new, low carb recipes
Download and use ‘Jazzas Arty Games’
Smile for 10 minutes, for no reason, 5 days
While the weekend hasn’t been the peak of productivity for me, it’s felt more like a normal weekend and I’ve made normal preparations for the week. Wish me luck.
I hope your week is filled with productivity if that’s what you choose or blissful relaxing. No matter what, remember to smile at least once a day. It looks good on you. Take care and stay safe.
I had a fairly good sleep but I really wanted more, so that’s what I did. I slept until about lunchtime then started my day.
I made some lunch and followed that up with sketching and inking a handful of Puddles. When I went to take the photos the batteries in my camera died. I tried to find the charged ones and of course, I couldn’t. So I gave up, grabbed a slice of cheese and got ready for a relaxing evening.
I made sure I got my French and Norwegian practice done before hubby got home.
Day 381 – 18 April 2020
I woke up not long after hubby and was planning on staying in bed and going back to sleep. I really wanted a coffee though, so I got up around 8 am and had a coffee. Once hubby had buzzed off to work I started working on a Puddles. I really want to catch up quick.
Once the first Puddles was sketched and inked, I sat and stared at the next empty cell in my sketchbook and I…procrastinated. I usually have Youtube videos playing as my background noise. I kinda zoned out watching it and I didn’t get a whole lot done. I did get them uploaded and finished colouring two of them.
In today’s Adventures of Arthur Puddles we find him goofing off for National Goof Off Day. Douglas dog enjoyed goofing off too and spent the afternoon laying in the laundry basket.
In today’s Adventures of Arthur Puddles we find him and Douglas dog enjoying some corn chips and dip on National Chips and Dip Day. Arthur had always wanted to eat corn chips and dip from a corn chip hat ever since he saw it on TV when he was just a little penguin.
By late afternoon I wanted to get a little rest, so I went back to bed for a couple of hours. When I got up, and hubby was already home, I decided to do French and Norwegian. It went okay but sometimes hubby will just start talking to me while I’m doing a timed practice and I just can’t focus.
Glad I got some stuff done, glad I got some extra sleep and didn’t feel bad about it. I hope you found something during your day to make you smile. Stay safe.
I felt great when I woke up. Hubby was home for the Easter break and I enjoyed the idea of having company through the day. I knew I wouldn’t do normal day things, which made me feel a little anxious seeing I’ve not had a ‘normal day’ in a month.
I ended up spending the day playing WoW and enjoying some delicious food that hubby cooked. It was a really relaxing day, mostly. There was one point towards the end of the day when I got way too stressed playing WoW. I knew it was something silly to be getting stressed over but I just couldn’t stop the internal rise of frustration and anger.
I did my best to talk myself down off the emotional ledge, tried to do some ‘meditation’ breathing to get myself calm and it seemed to work. So, what I mean by ‘meditation’ breathing is; often when you’re listening to a meditation guide they will talk you through a breathing in for so many counts, holding your breath, then exhaling for longer than you took in breath. This tells your brain to calm down. While it’s not advised to take ‘deep breaths’ to calm down, the type of breathing I have just explained is very helpful.
I’ve often thought that I don’t breathe the right way and am most likely not getting enough air. As it turns out, I’m pretty on point. I breathe through my nose and those breaths make my belly expand. I exhale through my nose and I don’t make a sound while doing it. This is the best way to breathe.
The area I need to improve on is my posture. I tend to hunch over my computer. My workspace is a coffee table, my work seat is a lounge chair with the back support at a slight reclined angle, so it doesn’t help me sit up straight. The way that I sit could mean that I am not breathing properly and I am putting unnecessary pressure on some organs. I am adding ‘correcting posture’ to my 40 List. I feel this is an important one.
Day 374 – 11 April 2020
After yesterday’s indulgent day, I opted for another. Although, this was a little foolish in hindsight. Even though I was feeling good all day, I didn’t give myself many breaks from a long day of playing WoW and by the late evening my heart rate was up above the average. It wasn’t at alarming or ‘get me to the hospital’ rates but as my heart rate has been residing in the ‘normal for my age group’ range for sometime (before all this nonsense began,) I don’t feel great when it’s not in that range, especially if I’m not working out.
Day 375 – 12 April 2020
When I woke up, my heart rate was still high…and it didn’t come down. I know (thanks to too many recent Google searches) that your heart rate tends to go up in the hours before you wake. It will most likely go up through the day, then start to come down in the evening. Things like the temperature, eating, stress or activity can make it go up.
So if you wake up feeling hot (which I often do because I’m always freezing when I get into bed) it’s likely your heart rate will be higher than the norm. I did some breathing exercises, splashed my face with cold water (another thing I read that can help calm your farm) and stayed in bed. It didn’t come down so I knew that it was going to be another bed day.
I didn’t do my usual mythical Sunday stuff and just stayed in bed all day. By the evening my heart rate had returned to normal. If anything, it was now below my ‘normal.’
Day 376 – 13 April 2020
I didn’t really want to do much today. I just wanted to keep as chill as possible and make sure my heart rate was going okay. I can happily report that it was a normal day for my heart. Hubby and I indulged in a day of Youtube watching. I got a little rest in the afternoon but then stayed up until a normal bedtime. I enjoy feeling normal.
If you need some Youtube inspiration, check out these channels:
How To Cook That This channel is run by Australian Ann Reardon, with appearances from her husband. Ann has a food science degree and creates amazing desserts that seem impossible BUT she tells you how to make them. There are videos on chocolate work, fixing cake disasters, creating giant chocolate bars, cakes without fondant and more. She also debunks videos from channels like 5 Minute Crafts and So Yummy by testing the ‘life hacks’ and explaining how and why they can’t work.
Chris Klemens This channel is just a bi-weekly vlog of Chris doing… stuff. He’s over the top but it’s all part of his charm and makes him even more compelling to watch. You will find casual videos like thrift shopping, food shopping, trying fast food, trying 5 minute crafts and a lot filmed while he is high on marijuana (which is legal where he lives.) While it sounds outlandish the one thing I really like about Chris is that he gives back to the community and always dedicates his videos to a ’cause’ or ‘charity’ that is in need of support.
You Suck at Cooking This channel appears to be demonstrating how to make recipes from the cookbook ‘You Suck at Cooking’ in a comical way. There is some great production value and you can learn lots of new cooking terms like ‘wang jangler’. It’s very lighthearted but still informative.
While I was disappointed that I didn’t get a post up today, I did say that I would talk about my new ‘gratefulness’ project. I first read about this project on the Squirmy and Grubs – Community Posts page.
Shane has been keeping a journal of one thing each day that made him smile. This seemed like such a great idea. So every Monday I will post the previous weeks things that made me smile. I will keep the collection of things that made me smile here; It Made Me Smile.
13 April 2020: When I was in bed resting in the afternoon and Homer dog bounced up onto the bed to give me lots of kisses and then settled down next to me for pats and snuggles. (He never does that in the afternoon.)
12 April 2020: When my heart rate finally came down to a normal level.
11 April 2020: When I heard black beans being called ‘masculine blueberries.’ It was in a cooking video called ‘Panic Fried Black Beans and Rice’ by the You Suck at Cooking Youtube Channel.
10 April 2020: Knowing that hubby would be home with me for the next four days. It’s nice to have company, plus he made delicious bacon and eggs for breakfast.
9 April 2020: When I watched a video of a man rescuing a baby deer that couldn’t walk. He helped it to get better, then returned it to the wild. The deer found its family and a year later it was happy, healthy and still with its family. Check it out here.
8 April 2020: When my friend ‘The Pally’ called me the second I said I hadn’t had the best day.
7 April 2020: When I read the list of things that made Shane smile from the past week, on the Squirmy and Grubs Youtube Channel. He has been keeping a daily log of things that make him smile for the past five years. It was an exercise in conscious gratefulness.
Day 377 – 14 April 2020
My heart rate was normal when I woke up and that made me happy. Although I was still feeling pretty tired so I went back to sleep. I woke up around lunchtime and thought I might try doing some of my day.
I started with a yummy lunch. Then got on to drawing a Puddles. This was a really hard one and once I was done with the rough sketch, I wanted hubby to see it before I inked it, to see if I had gone in the right direction. Of course, hubby was still hours away from getting home from work, so I decided to move onto something else productive.
I wrote this catch up post but obviously didn’t post it because I didn’t have any art-ing to post with it. Seeing they’re very wordy posts at the moment, I feel like I should at least give people the option of just staring at a cute penguin cartoon instead of reading my blah blah. (Any way you choose to support me is wonderful and I appreciate it.)
I finished the afternoon with some French and Norwegian. I even started a new topic in French. I’m sure I should be practising the stuff I already know, seeing I’ve barely done any in the past five weeks but…new stuff, new stuff, new stuff! La voiture est derriere le bus.
I’m really getting the knitting bug back so I think I’m going to start on a beanie for myself for winter AND finally finish the gloves I started last year for hubby. Hubby did point out that seeing football season has been postponed that I still have time to finish them off before he really needs them. He doesn’t want them for winter, no. He wants them for the start of footy season seeing they’re in this footy club colours.
It was a pretty good day. It feels nice to be back doing the life improving things. It’s been a slow start to the year but I AM going to make progress.
Day 378 – 15 April 2020
After four hours sleep, Homer woke me to go out. I struggled to get back to sleep and guess what? I had a high heart rate again. That made me feel stressed because I was looking forward to doing ANYTHING out of bed. So of course, my heart rate remained stubbornly high. The one thing today confirmed is that I need to make sure I’m getting plenty of rest and staying stress free. Two things I’ve struggled with for as long as I can remember.
I stayed in bed for most of the day. By the afternoon I had finally calmed down, relaxed, rested and was feeling back to normal.
Day 379 – 16 April 2020
I woke after about 7 hours sleep and was feeling fine. My heart rate was normal and it continued to be that way all day. I started the day with some casual gaming. After lunch I worked on a Puddles, French and Norwegian. I think I’ve found the ‘recipe’ that I want to use for a beanie knitting project and will start that in the next few days.
In today’s Adventures of Arthur Puddles we find him being inspired by Chris Ulmer @ Special Books by Special Kids. Arthur took a plate of fresh strawberries to celebrate National Florida Strawberry Day to his new friends house. Arthur’s new friend, Anna, has Down Syndrome and taught him all about her condition on World Down Syndrome Day.
For the most part, I should be able to get back to daily posting. I just need to make sure I give myself enough break times and probably (definitely) should work on ‘work’ things first before I spend time playing games. I know I will get back into great and productive habits again.
I hope that you and your families are staying strong and healthy during the Covid crisis. Don’t forget to reach out to those around you to make sure they’re doing okay. Stay safe.
Today was mythic Sunday. I spent the morning in WoW doing dungeons. I was very nervous about doing it because when I did it the previous week, I got really stressed and had the head rushes and erratic heart rate again. We stuck to doing easy things for the most part. The one hard dungeon we did was terrible but not my fault, so I stayed as relaxed as I could.
I took a nap in the afternoon and was surprised to see my friend, The Pally, in WoW when I woke up. I felt like I was still dreaming. It had been months since he’d played. It was a great finish to the day.
Day 369 – 6 April 2020
Today was another rest day, which I was allowing myself to have, in the hopes that I could get back to something of a normal routine on Tuesday. I played WoW. I was focused on getting a new character to level 65. I achieved. It was a good day.
Day 370 – 7 April 2020
I got up around a normal time and sat down in front of the computer. I told myself that I could play WoW for a little bit but then I’d have to get to doing some normal day stuff. Unfortunately, I kept moving the finish line and before I knew it, I had spent the entire day in WoW. I think that knowing I had not done what I should have, combined with my overwhelming desire to level quickly, I ended up feeling quiet stressed.
By the time I got into bed the familiar head rushes and erratic heart rate were back. I screwed up. Having now been through these feelings more than once, I remained as calm as possible and got to sleep as quickly as I could.
Day 371 – 8 April 2020
Guess what I did today? Yep! I spent the day in bed. Thanks to my self imposed stress I spent the day with an elevated heart rate and complete exhaustion. I spent more hours asleep than I did awake. It’s such a miserable feeling.
Day 372 – 9 April 2020
I have spent most of the day in bed. Thankfully I have been feeling better but really didn’t want to push myself. It is now more than obvious that any amount of stress triggers the erratic heart rate and complete exhaustion. The only thing that helps is bed rest. I need to learn some new coping techniques and fast.
Hubby is home for the next four days because of Easter. I probably won’t get much done (week five of not getting much done. BLEH!) It’s really hard to push myself back into my normal routine. Some part of me is reluctant because I often put too much stress on myself to get things done which will inevitably lead to bed rest. Getting the balance right will be hard.
Today I started with a little French and Norwegian. I am happy to say that after having a month off learning languages, I still remember things. I had a good practice run of both languages. I wasn’t feeling overly focused and know that I did make a couple of mistakes because of that but I was generally getting 18/20 during each timed practice run.
In today’s Adventures of Arthur Puddles we find him spending the day as a frog for World Frog Day. It was a good day at the pond and Arthur loved making a new friend.
Seeing I have done a few little normal day type things, I’m going to call it at 3 pm and just get my relax on. I am starting a new ‘being grateful’ project and I will do my first post about it on Monday.
I hope everyone has a happy and safe Easter. Most countries are still advising to social distance during this time, which I know will be hard for a lot of people. Stay strong and know that the sooner we do what we’re asked, the sooner we will return to life as we like it. Take care.
Happy One Year Blogiversary to me. Thanks to everyone who has followed my journey so far, stuck with me through the hard times and offered advice, feedback, well wishes and likes. I know I am not alone in my struggles and the support I’ve had over the last year is priceless. I hope you will continue following my journey through the upcoming years.
Day 359 – 27 March 2020
I felt okay when I woke up but didn’t really want to push myself too hard. I thought I’d start the day with some casual WoW playing. 13 hours later I logged off and went to bed. I got totally consumed levelling a new character. WoW was doing double levelling experience so it was very quick. It wasn’t really the best way to spend the day but it was enjoyable and as I always say; you have to enjoy the little things.
Day 360 – 28 March 2020
I ended up waking up around lunchtime. Getting extra sleep at the moment is high on my to do list. I’m still not feeling great and my heart rate is still being more erratic than I’m comfortable with. I know I should probably go to see a doctor but there are a couple of things that are really stopping me.
Obviously the first hurdle to visiting a doctor is my agoraphobia. (This is so hard for me to talk about.) I haven’t left the house in over two years, possibly three. Before that I had mostly stayed in for about four or five years.
Four years ago, when my dad was dying from cancer, I came home and acted like I was normal. That was a very stressful time because not only did I have to care for someone who had abused me for 25+ years, I had to stop paying attention to how I felt or I wouldn’t have been able to leave the house.
Once my father passed away, I didn’t leave the house much after that. I went to the airport a couple of times to pick up wifey, a Christmas shopping trip with wifey and that’s about it. Each event felt more and more stressful.
I am worried that something bad will happen to me if I leave the house. I’m worried (even though hubby is a pretty good driver) that I’ll end up in a car accident. I’m worried a stranger will be mean, hurtful or violent towards me. I’m worried something bad will happen to the house if I’m not there. Worry, anxiety and stress are overwhelming and that’s just thinking about leaving. The reality of leaving is so much worse.
The second obstacle is my fear of people. I’ve spent a lot of my life being judged, being told I’m not good enough, being told that I am doing everything wrong. Having a stranger (Doctor) doing that to me is too overwhelming. I know I will shut down and still not do what I have to.
The third obstacle is the Covid-19 virus. While this is such an issue, I don’t want to go to a Doctors office or the hospital. I don’t want to put myself at risk of catching it. My immune system doesn’t handle sickness and especially not one of this magnitude.
Wow, I wasn’t really expecting all that to come out. I was just going to talk about my levelling for another day in WoW. With my levelling obsession in full swing, I spent the rest of the day levelling my character to max and getting her geared enough for Sunday mythics.
There wasn’t time at the end of the day to do a post so I figured I would get caught up (again) on Sunday.
Day 361 – 29 March 2020
My mythical Sunday started earlier than normal, which I was happy about. I’ve been playing WoW with a healer friend for 3 years and it has been enjoyable for the most part. We jumped straight into a hard dungeon and I got super stressed, super quickly. BAM!!! The same feeling from two weeks prior started again. My head started feeling light, my heart rate accelerated and I just felt off. After two easier dungeons I had to call it a day and get back in bed.
I spent the day in bed and of course there was no chance of an update.
Day 362 – 30 March 2020
I spent Monday in bed. I just didn’t want to push myself at all. I continued my diet of Youtube videos and naps. When it was time to sleep, I tried a Guided Healing Meditation; Cell and Nerve Healing. I was able to get through it without it causing any weird feelings and it got my heart rate down to a healthy rate after about 16 minutes. The guide goes for 47 minutes.
Day 363 – 31 March 2020
It was another uneventful rest day. I binged on Youtube videos and only got up when hubby was home. It was a long day in bed because hubby had to do overtime again. We’re very thankful he’s been getting a little extra work during a time when so many people are unable to work.
During one of my naps I had some pretty bad dreams about my dad. I just couldn’t shake the bad feels after that. There has been a string of bad dreams over the last few days. Not my usual weather dreams either. I would take a tornado dream over the ones I’ve been having any day.
The highlight of the day was my friend, The Pally, getting in touch. He’s been busy working hard and we’d gone a few weeks without talking. I sometimes feel like our friendship is a burden on him. While I’m always there to listen and support him however I can, I don’t feel like I have much to offer. Most of the time I don’t understand why anyone likes me.
Day 364 – 1 April 2020
It was another day mostly in bed. Hubby had to finish off the overtime from the previous night, so he was home late-ish again. Even though I’ve still been able to chat with wifey on Discord, it’s been crazy lonely with hubby getting home so late. I’m thankful that I have two people who love me and I was even more thankful that my friend, The Pally, got in touch with me again.
Day 365 – 2 April 2020
There wasn’t much to today but I decided to work on a Puddles. I drew up about six days worth of cells, grabbed my supplies and worked from bed. It almost feels like the universe decided I wasn’t isolated enough and just wanted me to share the struggles of everyone else. It worked. I feel more isolated and I’m definitely struggling more. Not having my art, language learning or even simple comments from wonderful people from all over the globe has kind of hit me hard.
Puddles will be playing catch up for a while. We’re going back a few weeks for today’s.
In today’s Adventures of Arthur Puddles we find him, Rosie and Douglas dog celebrating St Patrick’s Day. Arthur was waiting for Rosie in a pot of gold (chocolate) coins at the end of a rainbow. Rosie served up some frothy green drinks. Even though they couldn’t go out, they had fun celebrating at home.
Day 366 – 3 April 2020
The first thing I did was grabbed my Puddles sketch book and tried to mentally plan out a few to draw. I was successful. In between napping and Youtube I managed to get three drawn. It was a nice day and I was glad to get out of bed when hubby got him. I stayed as relaxed as I could and we had a lot of laughs watching photo slideshows on Youtube about how people are dealing with the Covid-19 crisis. You can check them out on the DAILY HUMOR channel.
In today’s Adventures of Arthur Puddles we find him celebrating National Button Week in the most peculiar way. He found inspiration in a song written by Sia. The song is called Buttons. He had a lot of fun recreating scenes from the video clip.
Day 367 – 4 April 2020
Today has been a hard day. I’m not sure if it’s because I really wanted to get an update done, get a bunch of Puddles finished or because it’s officially my one year blogiversary and I don’t think it’s been an overly successful year. I’ve felt pretty stressed all day which is the opposite of what I am trying to do at the moment.
Because of the extra stress I’ve been feeling today I haven’t really done much. I spent the morning on Youtube, followed by a sweet little nap. In the afternoon I got up to work on this update and colouring the Puddles. It took me a good 6 hours to get it all done.
The weekend starts for hubby tomorrow, so I will take another two days of resting without guilt. On Tuesday I am going to try harder to get back into a normal routine. I may still need more break times than I’d like but I know that if I can start working on my goals again, it will at least improve my mental health.
If you’ve read this whole post, you are my hero! Thank you. I hope you are keeping healthy, entertained and happy during the Covid-19 crisis. I know how hard it is and I’m sending you all the love and light I can. Stay safe.
WordPress has had a makeover. How fresh in a time of crisis. I wish I could have a makeover. I am feeling terrible. I woke just after hubby but stayed in bed. By about 9 am I was feeling ready to go back to sleep. I don’t remember when I went back to sleep but I did.
I woke in the afternoon and really wanted to stay in bed. I should have. I got up and spent a few hours slowly working on a Puddles. It was good in theory but the colour process…oh the colour process. I guess I just didn’t think it through well enough and with all the detail of the bamboo it didn’t come out as clean as I would have liked. I just don’t like it. Let’s not talk about it.
So with the Arthur Puddles cartoon, as you have probably picked up, they are to celebrate a National or International Day. Even though I had a whole lot of time off, I am going to continue with the same theme and still draw the days that have passed. I have been a bit conflicted if I should draw Arthur social distancing and self isolating. He’s a penguin (and a cartoon) so technically he doesn’t really need to. As a sign of solidarity for the crisis (and for future generations that may stumble upon the cartoon) I thought it might be interesting transferring his world to his house. With all that said, I’ll probably keep drawing him doing outside things until the time that Australia went into a semi lock down on the 24th.
In today’s Adventures of Arthur Puddles we find him visiting a Giant Panda for National Panda Day to find out if he’s doing okay. Arthur is very caring.
I am defiantly unhappy today but it is what it is. I very much have things to be thankful for and, I still am. I’m just unhappy. Fingers crossed I’ll get a good sleep tonight.
Oh, you also may have noticed in my update yesterday (or just in the tags for the concise version) that I haven’t mentioned meditation. I haven’t been able to do it. I don’t know why either. I have tried a couple of times but it’s made me feel sick, almost like sea-sick? Maybe not. Not sure I’ve been sea-sick. Whatever it is, it just hasn’t worked for me. Last night I tried to just picture one of the meditation guides I used to listen to and I fell asleep pretty quick. I miss it. That’s not the only thing I’m missing at the moment.
I hope that you are staying happy and healthy. Enjoy the little things because that’s all we have right now. (Takes own advice!)
The saga began on Day 347 around 10 pm. It was a normal night. I had done my alien post (although I didn’t really feel like writing a post) and I am pretty sure I was playing WoW. Wifey woke up and asked how I was doing. I said that I would probably go to bed soon.
Within a couple of minutes of saying that, I knew I had to get to bed immediately. I hurriedly tried to say goodnight and as I was typing the last few words of my message to her, I had the strangest feeling rush through my body. It felt like all the blood drained to my head, my neck got warm and my heart pounded. I got up, very scared of what was happening, and sat on the bed. I didn’t want to lay down. I was restless.
Hubby thought that I was going to pass out. The things I was describing sounded like things he’d experienced before he had passed out in the past. (It happened to him a handful of times when he was working long days and only getting about 4 hours sleep a night.) I didn’t pass out. The next thought was that I was having a panic attack. My heart rate was very erratic and that lasted about 5 hours. I couldn’t sleep. I was terrified about what was happening. I kept saying to myself if it got worse, I’d go to hospital. I ended up getting to sleep somewhere after 3 am.
Day 348 – 16 March 2020
After a very scary and sleepless night, I spent the day in bed. I slept. That was all I did. I barely drank water, I didn’t eat. I slept.
Day 349 – 17 March 2020
I spent most of the day sleeping. I made some toast for lunch and made an effort to drink more water. I had a small dinner and sat up for a while. That wasn’t pleasant. I kept getting weird head rushes again and my heart rate kept bouncing all over the place. I tried to not panic.
Day 350 – 18 March 2020
After spending two days in bed, my muscles and joints ached. I tried to sleep again but it was getting harder. I was so restless. I wanted to get up but I still didn’t have the energy, so I thought I’d distract myself by watching some stuff on Youtube on my phone.
Founded in 2016, SBSK is a 501(c)3 organisation that seeks to normalise the diversity of the human condition under the pillars of honesty, respect, mindfulness, positivity and collaboration. This multi-media movement supports the acceptance and celebration of all members of the neurodiverse/disability community regardless of diagnosis, age, race, religion, income, sexual orientation, gender or gender expression. -Chris
Taken from the ABOUT page on the SBSK Youtube Channel.
I spent the day watching this channel. I laughed, I cried, I became motivated. The people that Chris meets and the stories he shares are beautiful stories of strength, perseverance, joy, family and the never ending journey for acceptance for all people.
I’ve always thought of myself as a good person. I try and make people feel good, I listen if someone needs that and I’m always ready to give a hug or a smile. Watching these stories really made me want to be a better person. To be more of all those qualities.
Apart from the fact that I didn’t have the energy to get out of bed, it was a really good and encouraging day. I eventually got out of bed when hubby got home but kept getting lightheaded and heart racy. I was finding it much easier to get my heart rate down quicker though so it wasn’t as scary.
Day 351 – 19 March 2020
It was another day of short naps and Youtube videos in bed. I spent a lot of the day watching more videos from the SBSK Channel (I have years of catching up to do) and I watched an episode about an interabled couple. They both had such amazing personalities and upon noticing they had their own Youtube channel, that was my next stop. After watching a few videos from them, I was hooked. Shane has got the best sense of humour. They have recently set up a help fund during the Covid-19 crisis for people with disabilities.
Even though I hadn’t been feeling as horrible as the beginning of the week, I was still very reluctant to get out of bed while hubby wasn’t home. The only problem with that is it was a 35 degree day and hubby was doing some overtime. It was a long, hot day in bed. I tried to stay distracted with naps and Youtube. Hubby got home around 10 pm and I was ready to get out of bed. It was nice to be up for a couple of hours before a night of nightmares and restlessness.
Day 353 – 21 March 2020
You’ve probably noticed a theme to the week; short naps and Youtube videos. Today was another. It was also another night of nightmares and broken sleep.
Day 354 – 22 March 2020
Hubby had a huge week at work and was exhausted. He slept-in until about 11 am. We didn’t do much with the day. I stared at the TV thankful I wasn’t spending another day in bed. I didn’t have the energy for more than staring though. We watched one of my favourite movies, Deadpool, in the evening and had an early night.
Day 355 – 23 March 2020
We woke up around 10 am and I got up at the same time hubby did. Hubby pottered around the house doing some housework (that I haven’t been able to do for a week, UGH!) He cooked some spaghetti sauce using all our leftover veggies. He also cleaned the cupboards and fridge out so we have some hope of packing away all our extra supplies. I did a little vacuuming and cleaned up one of the neglected side tables. I probably shouldn’t have done that. It was a huge energy drain.
Day 356 – 24 March 2020
I was hoping to get back to something of a normal schedule but I had zero energy. Actually, I think zero energy would have been an acceptable level. I couldn’t get out of bed. I slept most of the day. I got up when hubby got home. I tried to stay still and calm as I ate dinner and watched Deadpool 2. There was only one time I thought I was going to be light headed again but it seemed to pass quickly.
Day 357 – 25 March 2020
After another hard night sleep I woke when hubby did around 7 am. I stayed in bed and messaged wifey. We chatted until around 8.30 am, hubby left for work and I promptly went back to sleep. There was no way I could stay awake.
Homer woke me around 12 pm because he wanted to go out. I made a quick lunch and got back into bed. I returned to Youtube and watched a variety of videos, when I found one about; Advice for people who feel like their art isn’t unique. It actually made me feel better about my journey. This is only my first year on the bus. It’s been a bit of a bumpy journey (especially the last two weeks) but there is still a long way to go.
I was inspired to get back to art-ing and inked a Puddles that I had drawn a few weeks ago and I really should have used a new pen. I never know when is the right time to switch them out. I don’t want to waste them but they get to a point where they don’t make solid lines. Today was that day. I tried to fix it as much as I could in editing but I ran out of energy pretty quickly.
I’m not sure I’ll be bouncing back to a normal schedule just yet. I’m taking each day as it comes. If I’m up to it, then I’ll get things done, if I’m not, then it’ll be a day of bed rest. As soon as I’m feeling better I will get caught up on all the daily Puddles.
In today’s Adventures of Arthur Puddles we find him and a few friends reenacting a scene from The Wizard of Oz. He will return to his normal adventures very soon.
How is the Covid-19 crisis affecting our family?
At the moment, life is running as normal for us. No one has symptoms of the virus, so we’re all pretty confident that none of us have it. (Even though I do have something going on with me.) Because of my agoraphobia, hubby and I have pretty much self quarantined for the last 3 years. Wifey and her mom are much the same. They only go out for things when necessary. So this hasn’t been much of a change for any of us.
As non essential services have been closed in Australia this week, we have started to worry about hubby’s job. He works for a bed store and at this point, they remain open. We are worried that there won’t be enough work for him though if people are self quarantined and not shopping. It’s tough enough living on a single income and we’re not sure what we’ll do if he gets stood down. The Australian government is offering additional help during this time but it’s still a cause of concern.
With our borders shut, as most are, we now have no idea when it’s likely that wifey will be able to come back to Australia. While it doesn’t change our relationship at all, it’s hard not knowing when we’ll get to be together again.
Hubby and I have been stocking up on pantry items over the last few weeks. He’s going to get some frozen veggies tomorrow and then we should be stocked in the event that there is a full shutdown. We should be able to survive three weeks without needing to leave the house.
What can you do to help during the Covid-19 crisis?
Follow the advice of local authorities to self quarantine. That means staying in your home. Don’t visit friends or family members. Also make sure you practice social distancing when you are in public.
Be respectful when stocking up for staying in. In Australian supermarkets we are now limited with how many items we can buy. If that’s not something being done where you are, please take only what you feel is necessary to get you through a few weeks of quarantine.
Reach out to vulnerable people via phone or online. This crisis is causing major isolation which is very hard for a lot of people. Just the simple act of asking ‘Are you okay?’ could make a huge difference in someone’s day.
Think about the positives of staying at home. This is a great time to spring clean, learn some new skills, start a home workout routine or complete that art project you’ve been putting off.
I hope that you, your families and friends are safe, healthy and happy right now. Please follow the advice of your local government and authorities to make sure your community can stay safe and recover as quickly as possible.
It was another night of healing meditation before sleep last night. I hope that this meditation is having a positive affect on my health. If nothing else, it’s definitely helping me to sleep better. After hubby got up this morning, he closed the door so Homer dog wouldn’t wake me. I slept in. It felt good.
That was about the end of the feeling good for the day. My back was crazy sore when I got up but thankfully through the day it started feeling a bit better. I will put that down to the fact that I channelled my inner potato and did nothing on the couch all day. Well, I Puddled and did some French and Norwegian practice.
I listened to healing meditation before sleep last night. It was a nice sleep but not enough because Homer dog woke me up early. I tried to get back to sleep but as soon as hubby had jumped in the shower, Homer was waking me up again. Not for any reason, just because he wanted to wake me up. He’s fun like that.
My back isn’t feeling much better and a day of art-ing probably hasn’t helped. I just couldn’t go another day without pulling out the watercolours. I found some inspiration on Youtube; Simple Watercolour Landscape Painting. I watched the whole thing through once, then paused it on the finished version and did what I wanted.
In today’s Adventures of Arthur Puddles we find him, Rosie and Douglas dog having some fun ice-skating. They didn’t need skates but they did need their earmuffs to celebrate National Earmuff Day.
I finished the day with an excellent practice of French and Norwegian. I think it might be getting close to a new topic in each, although I won’t start them both on the same week.
I hope your week has been filled with good health, good friends and an abundance of creativity. Stay safe.