Day 56

It was a cold morning and hubby and I both struggled to get out of bed. We huddled over quickly cooling cups of coffee and discussed things for the shopping list.

Once hubby had gone to work, I did normal morning things, including my double workout. During my arm reps, I was thinking how much easier it is doing them from when I first started. When I first started, just doing 12 reps was a stress on my body. Now, I do them with ease, every day trying to push them a little harder, making sure every muscle is being worked.

After that I sat down for some social media fun. I’ve decided that I’d like to spend more time reading, liking and commenting on other people’s work. Spread some encouragement around. Hopefully get some smiles in motion. I did a little of that. Then thought about things I wanted to find on Pinterest. So did a little of that. All the while I was trying to record some songs. I got so overwhelmed by all the different things I was trying to do at once, I cried. There are so many things I want to achieve in a very short 2 years time. I get a little eager sometimes.

To slow my brain down I decided to make lunch. A quick bowl of noodles with chicken and onion. Then I picked up my knitting needles and got to work. I’m loving knitting but my index finger is getting sore holding the yarn… or for some reason. Of course that won’t stop me. My finger is just going to have to get used to it.

It’s almost a scarf!

I had done a couple of rows and decided that I could start learning French while I knitted. Obvious, right? My first stop was a website called Duolingo. This wasn’t what I was looking for but I did spend about 20 minutes going through the first lessons. I like the way it teaches and will definitely be doing it daily. It takes actual attention, so I’ll just set aside 30 minutes every day or few days (depending on what creative is tickling my fancy) and see how much I can learn.

Then I searched for a Youtube video that I could have on while I was knitting. I found a 25 minute video for all the basics you need, Learn French in 25 Minutes. I learned that I knew more French words than I thought and I make more holes in my knitting while I’m learning French. I enjoyed the combination though, so I’ll do it again.

Tomorrow I’ll fill my day with more of the same. As long as I keep busy during ‘work’ hours, I’ll be a happy panda. If you’ve read this far, I just want you to know, you’re amazing and your eyelashes are lovely.

Here’s Day 23 of the writing challenge. If you’d like to see the full challenge details, click here. All 30 days will be posted here.

Day 23: A letter to someone, anyone.

Dear ‘Person who tried to break into my house while I was home,’

I can only imagine the things you were thinking as you tried to break into my house. I’m sure you felt you needed the few things that I have. I’m sure you had to make a quick buck and one can only hope it was to care for your family and not feed an addiction.

You didn’t know I was home and you don’t know how badly it has affected me and my puppy since that afternoon. I fear leaving the house. I fear being in the house. I fear not answering the door in case that is the green light to break into my house. I fear losing things that are precious to me. I fear for my safety. These are my daily fears.

My puppy has not been the same since that day. He had always been a confident little guy and that day, the constant banging, the yelling at him, broke him. He’s now terrified of any banging noise. He can’t stand the sounds of the wind. You did that to him.

That day you didn’t get into the house and you left with nothing. We had not much more than that either. In fact, at the time, hubby wasn’t even getting paid for working 12+ hours a day. We were being evicted because we couldn’t pay our rent and YOU were trying to take from us.

Today I realised you did take something. It was something more important than a broken laptop or a wedding ring, you took my self-confidence.

I don’t know your story and you don’t know mine but my story changed that day. It’s time for me to rewrite my story. I will feel confident and safe again one day.


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Tilly Collins

I'm on a life changing journey to 40. There will be ups, there will be downs. I'm like a roller coaster but with more agoraphobia.

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