Day 31

It’s one month since I’ve started my journey and I have made some progress. Working out is very much a part of my day now. I’m about a week away from adding an extra daily workout. While I find it a little daunting still, I’m very committed to continuing the fitness journey. I never thought I’d hear myself saying that.

My first task for today was knitting. I found a guide, got my knitting needles and yarn and spent hours fiddling only to realise I am not a natural at knitting, not even a little bit. I’m sure I’ll pick it up but right now it feels like I’m trying to knit with two left feet. Yes, feet!

My second task for the day was to draw something. By the time I sat down to this task, I was feeling far too unhappy to focus. I scrolled through some pictures online for inspiration but it didn’t help. I’ll put this task aside for a new day.

So why was I unhappy? I’m lonely. It hit me like a truck as I sat in silence with one of only three people that I talk to. I’m not sure I remember how to have a normal conversation. I don’t know how to be a friend. I mean, I’m a great listener, supportive and caring but I just don’t know how to interact with people enough that someone wants to waste their time on me. I’m grateful for those that do.

Tomorrow I’m going to get some thing packed/unpacked and do one creative task.

Tilly

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Tilly Collins

I'm on a life changing journey to 40. There will be ups, there will be downs. I'm like a roller coaster but with more agoraphobia.

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